I just flexed and they got intimidated.
— Schwartz, on how he knocked over empty glass bottles with his butt
You take medicine with beer, right?
— Scott
If they offered a degree in rolling your eyes and kissing up, that’d be a useful degree.
— Bobby
These cheeseballs changed my life. It’s like meeting Jesus for the first time, really…
That printer is tough. It could beat Chuck Norris and Jack Bauer at the same time with one USB cable tied behind its back
— Bobby
He’s not a tax evader, he’s a tax invader.